Facing the “September Scaries”
When I was a child, the beginning of a new school year always brought fresh anxiety. As late August approached and the evening cicadas buzzed louder and darkness descended earlier, I would be overcome with dread. The prospect of impending routine, new teachers, and 9-hour days away from home caused me to toss and turn at night and feel physically ill.
Even now, by the time September rolls around, I’m hit with a wave of anticipation and fear. The turning of the season brings with it a sense of loss. Every year, I’m shocked by how much anxiety I feel about autumn’s approach. In my mind, summer is one long, sun-soaked vacation, a fever dream of social activity and fun. Fall is the return of responsibilities, routine, darkness, demands.
Whether or not you are still bound to a school schedule, many of us still carry a script or narrative about the change of the seasons, meaning many of us probably find ourselves in the grip of anxiety right now.
So, how do we handle the “September Scaries?”
First, it’s important to acknowledge that the changing of the seasons can bring a true sense of grief, especially if we feel like we haven’t taken full advantage of summer. Rather than brushing this grief aside or diminishing it, it can be helpful to make space for it. If you’re struggling to make space for these feelings, try the following mindfulness exercise that helps us accept and accommodate difficult emotions:
1. Close your eyes or fix your gaze to a point in front of you.
2. Bring up the feeling of anxiety, dread, or fear that accompanies the seasonal shift.
3. Identify the part of their body where you notice the most uncomfortable feeling or sensation as a result of this feeling.
4. Describe the sensation. Break it into components (where is the sensation; is it close to your skin or deeper; how big or small is it; what shape is it; does it ache, pulse, throb, vibrate or something else; does the sensation move; how thick is it; does it seem to have a temperature, and if so, is it hot or cold?)
5. Take deep breaths into and around the area of discomfort.
6. Make space for the discomfort – allow it to be there, give it permission to be there, sit alongside it.
7. Notice again how the sensation feels, from a very close perspective, and check if it has changed at all.
Second, it can be helpful to reflect on the parts of your summer that you most enjoyed and feel a sense of gratitude for, and on things about the upcoming seasons that you are looking forward to. If you’re having trouble with this, try the following journal prompts to either think or write about:
1. What are a few moments from summer that stand out to you? Write about them in detail. What was the sensory experience of those memories? What can you take with you from those special moments?
2. What is something in the upcoming season that you can look forward to? Maybe a holiday, or a shift in the weather, or a seasonal activity you enjoy. Write about what you’re most excited about. Integrate sensory details to make it come alive.
Lastly, it can be helpful to remind yourself that seasons cycle; summer will inevitably arrive again. But, for the moment, give yourself the grace of being present with this change. Make space for your feelings. Grieve the loss you feel, however small. Know that you are not alone with these feelings and that most of us find challenge in transitions. And, if you find that the negative feelings are sticking around longer than usual or that you could use help processing them, reach out to a trusted friend or professional to help.
